Facing the New Year with New Tools

Most people wouldn't look at a hammer and expect it to drive in a nail for them. I know you wouldn't; you'd pick it up and swing it. You'd put some effort into it. So why do so many people think there's a magic pill out there that will remove their fat and make them healthy? Many people believe Jack has the magic beans and if they could only find them ... You can fill in the rest.

Tools are meant to be used. Effort has to be exerted. If you want to get healthy, there are tools out there to help, but you have to do your part. If you use a tool that gives you more energy, will you use it to get up and moving around and exercise? If you use a tool to clean up your intestines will you drink plenty of water to flush out toxins? If you use a tool to help your body absorb more nutrients will you provide your body with better food? If you use a tool to suppress your appetite will you eat only when you are hungry?

The tools are easily available online and can be shipped right to your door. There's a 60 day money back guarantee. But will you use the tools to make a difference in your health? If so, comment below or message me. I want you to have a healthy 2016!

Not Just a Pretty Drink

My morning Plexus Slim

There are two types of people in the world, those who just believe what they're told and those who want to know why. I'm in the latter group. I've tried Plexus Slim. Heck, I've been drinking one a day for 8 months. By the way, it's super yummy! I've even had good results; lowered my cholesterol levels, lost inches and weight, more energy and more. But I've only taken a cursory look at why. There's the old saying, "Don't look a gift horse in the mouth." That's just not me. So I'm going to look at the ingredients in Plexus Slim and see if I can figure out WHY it works.

Green Coffee Bean

Chlorogenic Acid
Chlorogenic Acid is extracted from green coffee beans. What are green coffee beans? Well, green coffee beans are not the kind you put in your grinder. These are straight from the plant and not roasted. It seems roasting coffee beans eliminates a good chunk of chlorogenic acid. As I looked at the research with this acid several benefits appear. First is lowering the absorption of carbohydrates in the digestive tract. This in turn prevents a body's blood sugar from spiking and reduces the amount of insulin produced; sort of like eating a low carb diet. Other studies suggest that chlorogenic acid can reduce body weight by reducing the fat absorbed from food and reduce fat stored in the liver. It also helps improve the function of the fat burning hormone adiponectin. Chlorogenic acid studies have also shown lower cholesterol levels and triglyceride levels.

This is a scary thought.

Chromium
I've seen small amounts of chromium added to my multivitamins. And it's because chromium helps take blood sugar and move it to the cells to be used as energy. So if you have high blood sugar, it takes the sugar and puts it to good use. But it's not just sugar that converts to energy. Chromium also helps turn fats and protein into energy your body can use. Chromium has also been known to slow down the loss of calcium. Remember from science class, calcium is important for maintaining strong, healthy bones.

The fruit not found with the other produce.

Garcinia Cambogia
Garcinia cambogia is a fruit that I can't find at my grocery store; dang it! This too, helps with glucose levels. Studies have shown that it can lower insulin levels. This fruit can also lower the bad cholesterol and help raise the good cholesterol levels. A scientist working with garcinia cambogia says it needs to be combined with either potassium or magnesium. Plexus Slim uses a compound with potassium. He also says to take it on an empty stomach and avoid mixing it with food for at least 30 minutes to get the full benefit. Also, once mixed with water it will break down quickly. So drink it up right after you mix it. I have no problem with this, because it tastes so good.

Alpha Lipoic Acid
Several studies have shown alph lipoic acid can lower blood sugar levels. It also kills free radicals. I'm all for killing those radicals, but what does that really mean? Well, it means pain from nerve damage gets better. Germany has been using alpha lipoic acid to help people with nerve damage.

If you aren't eating your beets, at least you can drink some Slim.

Beet extract
This is what gives Slim the pretty pink color. But there's more to beet extract than just color. Oh yes there is. Studies have shown it can reduce blood pressure by widening the blood vessels. That's from the nitrates in beets. In turn it also helps get the blood flowing easier to the brain. No more brain fog.

I'm not even sure I've researched every single thing in Plexus Slim, but what I have makes me glad I started on this journey to better health. The most important thing is that I feel better. That is huge. My doctor even told me to keep up with what I'm doing. I will admit that I'm now taking more Plexus products. Yes, Plexus has a whole array of health and wellness products. I'm taking probiotics and magnesium. But there's pain relief, vitamins, skin cream and more. What did you like about this information? Comment below and let me know. Thanks for reading.

Changing it up!

Change- it's a simple word that encompasses many meanings and emotions. I used to feel change was frightening; and occasionally I still do. Think about it for a minute. For change to happen, most of us have to alter what we are doing. So why do we do that? In my case, I'd had enough. And most of us have to get to that point before we decide to change.

I was in my late 40s, feeling like my health was vanishing. I couldn't stop the scale from moving up. I had to force myself to do anything. My mood was crappy; I had to go to the doctor all the time, but nothing seemed to get better. And I was plain old tired of it. I needed a change.

So I took a leap of faith. And I'm not joking here. I bought a health drink. What? Am I crazy? Maybe, but I needed a change. And I got it. After one day of drinking Plexus Slim, I felt the energy. I didn't have to force a smile. It was real. And before long, I was losing inches here and there. It was easier to work; it was easier to exercise. Change

A little bit later, I noticed I lost some weight. I was really just surprised that I wasn't gaining. I used to have a reddish tint to my skin that some people thought was a sunburn, now my skin is whiter. After 2 months and 6 days of drinking Plexus my cholesterol level plummeted 38 points! I was astonished. I wanted change and that's what I was getting.

A little over a month ago I started using some more Plexus products; ProBio5 and BioCleanse. These products work together to restore health to the digestive system. But the changes I've seen are much more than better digestion. I've noticed my psoriasis doesn't itch as much or look as bad as it did before. Change I have real deep sleep on these products. I wake up so refreshed now that I don't even have a morning cup of coffee.  Change. Allergy season was bad this year. Before I'd have been relying on some allergy medicine and sinus rinse to alleve my headache. This year I've had a few sneezes, but no headaches. My eyes don't tear up for no reason like they used to do and make me scramble for a tissue. Change

Change doesn't happen overnight, in most cases. But change can happen. It's for real! If you are interested in change, let me know. Comment below or send me a message. I'd be happy to talk to you.

Turn it Around...

#plexusworks #thisisforreal

I've had a rough ride. I don't joke about this. One day my doctor told me I needed to lower my cholesterol. I got tips and suggestions on how to do this. Basically, give up red meats and cheese. Eat more vegetables and fruit. I tried; I really did. But sometimes I ate pepperoni pizza. When I had a stressful moment at work, I'd have a sweet. I'm not perfect, you know? Did it do me any good? NO!

My triglycerides and total cholesterol were still too high. My doctor sent in a prescription for a low dose of pravastatin. I had no idea at the time, but my life would change forever. I got my prescription and began consuming it every morning with my blood pressure medicine. After 3 months had passed, I had to give some more blood for a new lipid evaluation. At that time my doctor decided to double my "low" dose pravastatin.

Once I was on the new dose, I started feeling weird. My doctor told me to take CoQ10. So now I had to take something else to fix the side effects of my cholesterol medicine. I know it sounds insane, but I bought it and hoped for the best. As I look back on this time, I wonder what I was thinking. But I had never researched statins. I work, I'm busy; and basically it never occurred to me.

About the time the statins started lowering my cholesterol to an acceptable level for my doctor, I started feeling bad. My skin was red. My face was red; it was so bad people thought I was sunburned when I wasn't. My stomach was red. I NEVER expose my stomach to the sun, but it was RED. My neck and arms were red. I didn't know what was going on. When I sat down, my lower abdomen, hips and thighs would burn. I didn't know what was going on and I was scared.

I was so freaked out by the redness I called the school nurse and took a Benadryl.

The sad part is that I was extremely weak and couldn't concentrate at all. I ended up quitting the 2 meds I was on; lisinopril and pravastatin. I changed high blood pressure medicine with no problems, but dropping pravastatin was a mess. I ended up on my mom's couch for a good while. Thank God for a sympathetic mom. I had no idea what was happening to me and I'm still not sure now. I couldn't hardly eat or walk. My muscles were weak; I could always see my thigh muscles when I flexed them, but I couldn't see them now. I lost weight; no doubt about that, but at a price, muscle mass. Doing anything was a chore. I'm so glad my mom was a trooper and didn't give up on me.

The best Mom a daughter could ask for.

I was scared to drive by myself, but she made me drive alone to the store. She convinced me I could do it. And guess what; I did. Eventually, I made my way back home and to work. It was scary and my legs were shaking, but I did it. I'm still so damn mad that doctor prescribed medicine  that turned me into a semi-invalid.

I started exercising to strengthen my muscles. It seemed like all of them had turned to mush. I got to the point where working wasn't a problem, but my cholesterol started creeping back up. First it was 211, then it was 244; when it hit 250 my doctor wouldn't take no for an answer. I refused the statins. So what did she do? Well, she looked up other medicines. In my head that meant more side effects that I don't know about and more problems. By this time I'd been exercising regularly in hopes of losing weight and lowering my lipid counts. And it didn't seem to work. I couldn't lower cholesterol or lose weight. I felt like I hit a wall.

I didn't want to take any stupid cholesterol medicine. In fact I didn't even pick it up when the insurance finally approved it. Instead I contacted a friend who had been posting about a product that naturally lowers lipid levels and helps lose weight in several ways. I was curious and what did I have to lose?  I looked at some testimonials. Some people lowered their lipids and blood pressure and lost weight. One day I looked at some results and decided to order this product myself.

It took a few days to get my Plexus Slim, but I'm glad it came. Online ordering was a breeze. As soon as it showed up, I mixed it with some water and had a surprisingly delicious drink. As the days went by I realized I was in a better mood and smiled easier. I had more energy, not just in the morning, but all day. I began sleeping better; even on my old, crappy mattress. (I'm happy to admit that  now I have a new mattress.) Things were looking up, but my next blood test still loomed ahead.

I felt better. I was exercising more, but what's the actual blood work going to say? What's the doctor's scale going to read? I'd been taking my Plexus regularly for 2 and a half months before my blood work. And the results shocked me. My cholesterol went down 38 points and I had lost 6 lbs. My doctor tried to attribute it to the new medicine until I said I didn't take it. It was all Plexus and the energy it gave me to exercise and the will power it gave me over crappy food. I'll be going in for more blood work next month and I'm expecting to see even better results. I'm so glad I was led to try this product. I'm a skeptic; I never just jump on board with the latest fad. Plexus changed me in many ways for the better and I'm going to stick with it. Want to join me? Let me know.


Update: When I  went back for more blood work I found out my cholesterol is now normal. Total cholesterol is now 195 and triglycerides are 111. My doctor told me to keep doing what I'm doing. And I will!

Coming to a school near you... Tips for Teachers & Parents

I don't know about your particular city, but August in Missouri means back to school is right around the corner. Today I'd like to share some of my ideas about how to make the beginning of school work for you. I don't know about you, but I'm expecting tired feet and a hoarse voice.

Tips for Teachers

1.  Set up your room early. You know exactly what I mean. The cleaning crew came through during the summer and put most things back where you like it, but there's always a few things to rearrange. I started one week early this year. I'm slowly weaning myself away from vacation time to set up my room. You may want to change up your posters or bring in some new photos. Getting this done before you have to be back will make your life easier when school actually starts.

2.  Check out your class rosters and emails. Sounds simple to take some time at home to glance at your classes and emails, but I'm sure there are teachers who wait until they are at school. During vacation I try to check my email at least once a week. I like to know what's happening. There are multiple reasons to check your class rosters; maybe you get a student you've heard stories about. Well, now's the time to talk to last year's teacher and get some insight and strategies. In my case, I noticed I had students in my 7th grade class that were 8th graders. Better to nip it in the bud, to quote Barney Fiff. 

3.  Prepare as much paperwork as you possibly can. I'm not joking here. Everyone has their own open house and first few days agenda. I use important websites, syllabus and a student survey. You don't want to be waiting on the copy machine the day before school starts. Get all those items updated and copied early. You will be patting yourself on the back later. 

4.  Refresh your memory about board policies. I know this probably sounds ridiculous to some of you, but your school board has voted on lots of situations. If nothing else, look up teacher expectations. This is a must for teachers at a new district; and it doesn't hurt veteran teachers, either. 

5.  The more stuff you have done early, the easier it will be. I don't know about you, but when all my co-workers come back, I want to spend some time finding out how they spent their summer. I want to feel caught up on my home away from home. Having done some important items early, gives me the freedom to chat and spend time with the people who support me in my job. 

Tips for Parents

1. School supplies are important. You went to your local store and purchased way more than you thought; I understand. But (insert child's name) will have a much smoother transition into the next grade with all the supplies. If you are looking to cut back, I might suggest clothes. I know your kid grows like a weed; they all do, but do you have to buy to expensive jeans, designer tops, etc? And since I'm talking about clothes here, please find out about your school's dress code before major purposes. This could prevent some problems later on and save some money.

2.  Don't bother bringing the big items to school on the first day. I know you bought everything on the list. But if you know it won't fit into your child's locker, don't send it. The teacher will inform the entire class when the item is needed. Remember we had to get a list out for everything we need students to have for the entire year. Waiting won't hurt. I promise!

3.  Please take the time to attend Open House. Honestly, teachers love to see you on a positive visit. It's also nice to have an idea about who you are if a phone call is needed later in the year. Tell us your expectations for your child's year. What it provides for us is knowledge. I can remember that Johnny's mom expects him to make at least a B in class. So I can have a chat with him if he scores a C. 

4.  Don't expect everything to be perfect. The first few days of school are CRAZY! Buses are slow; kids don't know where to go. It's not going to be easy. If you expectations are low, guess what; you can feel positive about what does go right. 

5. Set a positive note for your child. Any doubts you might have, please don't pass them on. Your child knows you are supporting them, let them know their teachers are also. You may have heard one teacher is mean or (insert any other nasty comment), but that teacher could become your child's favorite teacher. Give them a chance to form their own opinions. Many of my students told me they heard I was mean, but loved being in my class, anyway. Rumors are just rumors. 

School is a time to educate and I love education. I hope all of you have a wonderful beginning of school. #backtoschool  #tipsforteachers #tipsforparents

<script async src="//pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js"></script> <!-- valerie --> <ins class="adsbygoogle" style="display:block" data-ad-client="ca-pub-5724157825830329" data-ad-slot="7693595696" data-ad-format="auto"></ins> <script> (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); </script>

Plexus journey

I sit here this morning waiting for my coffee to finish brewing. I don't really know what lesson I've learned yet. Today will be my twelfth day taking Plexus Slim or the pink drink, as I like to call it. I've only told one person, aside from my coach/seller, that I'm on this.

This is what I looked like a few days before starting Plexus Slim. The one person I told is taking the photo.

I guess this began about the time my doctor decided my cholesterol was too high at 250 and triglycerides at 166. In my defense the triglycerides went down from 234 while my total cholesterol went up.  Truthfully, I wasn't getting enough aerobic exercise and I was gaining weight. I'd been seeing posts about some nutritional drink that lowers blood sugar and helps burn off fat. 

You have to understand I'm not a dummy entirely. Magic potions aren't for real. This seemed to be a supplement providing things your body needs and you have to drink the recommended amount of water daily. Everyone should know that's half your bodyweight in ounces.  Twelve days ago that was 115 ounces for me. But I got off topic, my friend Malinda and I used to joke about the people who'd drink their lunch. Food is important for a body to function. 

Plexus just provided a nutritional drink and a strong water requirement. I started my first few days having more energy and sleeping better. I was excited to have more energy. I really moved more and noticed I'd go faster. I also noticed a few afternoons of heartburn. I hadn't had any of that in months. 

When I got up this morning I stepped on the scale. I was down 4 lbs. Will this continue? I don't know. I'm hoping to have my answer by the time this blog is published. I'll keep you informed. Hoping for good things, but sure I'm going to learn a lesson one way or another. Chow!

I'm now on day 16. I've had a couple setbacks. Mainly I got a cold. I woke up about 3 am on a Sunday morning and couldn't go back to sleep. I took a night time cold pill and woke up about 9 am. Sunday and Monday I felt poorly. I still kept up with my pink drink, though. Tuesday I went to work and was exhausted when I got home. I realized I wasn't really eating much. After a good supper I felt better and Wednesday I was less tired, but still had a cough. What does this mean? I don't know. I do know that I'm going to stick with it and my daily sit-ups, leg lifts, stretches and planking. It may be a little harder with my lungs full, but it will be twice as hard if I don't get back into it quickly. Bye for now.

Day 18- I can feel some results! My pants are fitting looser; I actually feel lighter. It may be more like moving seems easier. I love it! Technically, I'm down 5 lbs. I wouldn't actually admit it until I saw it several days in a row. I don't seem to feel the need to gorge myself with food. It's easier to stop eating. And I'm not really needing to count how much water I drink because I just do it. If this keeps up, I will be sold on Plexus.

Day 22- I stepped on the scale and realized I'm down 6 lbs. That's exciting. Later today I lifted some weights because I thought my arms seemed puny. I know, that's got to sound crazy, but unless you were on statins, you'd never know how I feel. When I was on pravastatin I noticed I had less leg muscles. I'm not joking here. All my life I'd been able to feel the muscle on my thigh when I flexed my leg. It got to to the point where I couldn't after pravastatin. I don't want to go there again, ever. I'm hoping my biceps are just slimming up. I do seem to have more definition, but lifting a few reps can't hurt. I'm looking forward to seeing more inches gone. Until next update...


Today marks day 24 and there's been some interesting developments. A shirt I couldn't wear a month or two ago I now wore to school. Before it was gaping in the bust area so much I thought the buttons would burst. I wore it all day today with no worries. That was a good feeling. Sleep is like drifting on a cloud. Since I've been on Plexus sleep is deep and restful with only one exception. I caught a cold; I'm a teacher and it happens. The first night of my cold I woke up with problems getting back to sleep. That's the one exception to sleeping in peace. I'm sure there's more to come.

It's day 41 today. It seems like my belly has slimmed down. My cravings are nothing now. I've eaten twice today with a few peanuts to tide me over. I try not to worry about my weight loss, but I've maintained my loss of 5 lbs. Sleeping is great. Usually I wake up once a night and fall back asleep easily. Water is now a habit. I've started drinking my Plexus before coffee. I really don't need the coffee, but it's become a routine before Plexus. I don't really care one way or the other if I drink it. I never add sugar or milk. So I don't think of it as any added calories.

 Week 7; almost 8. It's getting to hard to count the days I've been on Plexus. I stopped and decided to do measurements today. I compared my first measurements with those today and discovered 4 inches have been removed from my body! Wow, that's exciting. My upper torso has slimmed down most of those inches, but I'm still managing to whittle away at those hips of mine. Last Friday I fit myself into my favorite capris that I couldn't button a few weeks ago. That says something right there. I'm still hoping for lower triglycerides and cholesterol, but like seeing some visible signs that I've done something good for my health. More results will follow.

Today marks 2 months on Plexus. So I had to do my official count. I don't like taking my measurements. Whatever number I see, I want it to be less. Today I added it to my spreadsheet log and found 5 inches are gone. Do I look much different? Not really. But I'm going to keep on lifting weights, do cardio and drinking my pink drink and water, water, water.

This is me in the same clothes 2 months later. Pants are much looser. And I am starting to see definition in my belly.

Now I've been drinking Plexus Slim for over 2 months. And the moment of reckoning is coming soon. I'm going to get my fasting blood work done in a couple days. This is going to tell me if my 250 Total cholesterol has gone down. Are my 166 triglycerides down? I need to know. My changing body shape has been slow; and I don't mind that. I take my measurements and expect better until I see them compared to my former measurements. I've lost 7.5 inches from my body. That's a major accomplishment for a couple months. I've also gone down a pant size. Of course, my goal changed to a smaller size.

I think I'm having trouble remembering what it was like to need a quick pick me up. I don't really need them. I used to crave something in the middle of the day and eat some candy, although I don't really care for sweets. Those weird cravings are gone; instead I'm stuffing myself with more water. Well, not stuffing, but drinking. More and more water. It feels good. And it is good. When I get my blood work results, I will probably share this blog and dare I add some photos? Maybe. Until next time...

It is 10 weeks, almost 11 that I've been taking Plexus Slim and I went in for my fasting blood work. My last cholesterol reading was 250 and triglycerides were 166. Although I waited for 20 minutes to get called back. It took little time to get a vein. If you knew my sensitive veins, you would be amazed. Some credit goes to the awesome phlebotomist, but I also think drinking my ration of water daily also helped. I'm down 7 and a half inches. I can fit into pants and shirts I couldn't before, but what about internally? I know my cholesterol is considered unacceptable. My doctor made a big deal about how high it is. Has Plexus helped me lose inches and lower my bad cholesterol? Only time will tell.

Me today in the same clothes.

Got my results back online this morning. Most of them were good. Cholesterol was 250 and now it is 212. It went down a big 38 points in 2 and a half months! My LDL was 159; now it is 121. Again down 38 points. Triglycerides are strange, though. Recall I was at 166; now they went up a few to 174. I know I like my red meats and such. Maybe something here with change next time. I am happy to have gone from high cholesterol down to borderline high. And I will keep up with my Plexus every morning.

Keep Calm: The End is Almost Here

So it's almost the end of the year.... I think the key word here is almost. The kids seem to have given up. They know the end is near. I know the end is near, but not near enough. Today we had a fun day. Kids with all passing grades played fun games; I'm talking about almost carnival rides. Kids with failing grades were in what my school calls lockdown. They were in classrooms making up the work they didn't do.

My part in a this was two-fold. I had made a quick summer school promotion video over the weekend and spent a good chunk of my morning showing it to kids who might attend summer school. I'm not above pandering. I need kids to attend summer school for fun so I can teach my fun classes.  The second part of my day was spent with some kids in lockdown who had work to finish to pass their classes.

I have a hard time understanding students who think they don't have to do their work. It's probably because I was never in that situation. I didn't think doing my work was a choice. I hope my own sons felt the same way. So being around students who abandoned any thoughts of finishing their work was a chore. Thankfully, another teacher was in her room with me. Thanks Mrs. C for being so kind when I was getting a little crazy.

And crazy was how I felt, honestly. Students tried to take tests before they were ready. I saw study guides that didn't even answer the questions. There was no way these kids were going to pass tests with totally wrong answers on their study guides. Once again, thank you Mrs. C. for being so patient. Your modeling helped me not completely lose my cool. I persevered and made it until 3:00. I will probably see most of these students at summer school, as so I should. But I shant be teaching them. Someone with more patience and kindness in their heart will help them get the basics they should have learned in class with their teacher.

Maybe these students will learn something my Dad taught me a long time ago: Do something right the first time. I had to redo washing the dishes because I left some dirty, but I learned a good lesson from it. Maybe students can learn to complete their work right the first time so they don't have to redo it. I don't know. I would hated to have to attend summer school to pass my core classes. But I never went down that road. I hope this will be a learning experience for those that must attend.

What have I learned from this day? Kids will be kids. There's no use getting myself riled up about it. Calm and cool is the way to be. I can let students deal with the consequences of their choices. It wasn't my choice, after all. And I've learned to be thankful for my co-workers who can demonstrate the patience needed to show me how I need to behave. Lord, I am thankful for my co-workers. Just remember... The End is near! Until next time...

Dealing with loss a Widow's Journey

Update: As I reread this nine year old blog I realized just how far I've come in my widow journey. Happiness and joy are more prevalent than heartache and pain. I'm taking my life lessons, empathy and compassion for my fellow widows and turning it into a coaching practice. Life can get better and better with each passing day. Keep the faith!

I just read a post about how to grieve for the loss of your husband. Wow, that resurfaces a lot of old wounds. And when I say "old" I'm talking about 7 and a half years. But right now it feels fresh. The emotions can come back in a flash even after many years. Losing a spouse is not something most people get over within a set amount of time. That was my first lesson.

My husband is second from the left and has his tongue out. :)

Everyone is different. I've seen it firsthand in the widow support groups. So my first advice to you is that there's no timetable on your grief. Grieving itself is a coming to grips with reality that can seem neverending. And when I mean that, I'm talking about daily you will find something that reminds you that your spouse is gone. It's possible to hide the grief or bury it in a new relationship, but dealing with it is a necessary ingredient to healing.

It really doesn't matter how long you were married. I was married almost 22 and a half years. The pain is real no matter how long you were together. Those with shorter times grieve over what could have been. Those like me, married for a longer time, still had dreams of growing old together. Time together is irrelevant; it's the expectation of your joined lives and the loss that hurts. Coming to grips with the reality of a new life is one of the hardest things I've ever done.


My first memorable moment of that terrible reality occurred at a Friday work faculty meeting. I sat there thinking that the gal talking in front of me was going home to her husband. And I am going home to an empty house. It pains me to think of this, but I spent most of that meeting trying to deal with that terrible fact. I didn't learn much about whatever concept was introduced, but I was facing the facts of my new life.

I did have our dog, which became "my dog" and thank God for Ruffy. His needs were something I could focus on when I needed to push myself. On my planning hour I came home to take him out and to make sure everything at my house was okay.

My next lesson deals with acknowledging your feelings. I journaled like crazy. I'm fortunate that I wasn't involved with facebook at this time. I was a mess and I went from being mad to being sad in the course of a few hours. It was crazy. But it was my personal journey and I documented it on a spiral bound notebook. I haven't had an occasion to review it lately, but I've been through it many times. It can help remind you of how far you've come in the grieving process.

I found support. I was lucky enough to find a widow support group online. Those people helped me realize I wasn't alone. Being alone when you are already alone and feeling alienated is the worst feeling. Knowing there were other widows out there dealing with the same problems gave me some hope. It may sound strange, but when you've been left alone you need to know there are others experiencing the same feelings. A bond forms when you meet other widows.

My first experience meeting another widow online was scary for me. I was going to Kansas City for a conference and she lived near KC. She told me to give her a call. I was all alone in my room, because widows aren't the best company. So I took a chance and gave her a call. She showed up at my hotel and amazing as it might sound, we hit it off. We shared experiences of teaching and being widowed. And still today I think of her as a good friend. She actually helped me out more than she knows. Thanks J!

Hurdles. Yes, there are hurdles to leap in the process of grieving. I made a point of remembering every first I accomplished, because it meant I was moving forward. It's crazy how many "firsts" you can accomplish. My most recent one was driving from Missouri to Colorado last summer solo. It may not seem like much to you, but it was a big deal for me.

Am I totally over my loss? I would have to say, "No". Am I dealing with what my life has become? Well, I'd have to say, "yes". Life is a strange mix of good and bad. Sometimes it feels like one overcomes the other, but give it time. Take care of yourself, mentally, physically and emotionally and things will balance out. Until next time....

Where's the focus?

I play a game called Criminal Case. It's a harmless game that makes me feel like a detective, sometimes anyway. One of the crime scenes is set to see the differences. It's neat, but occasionally I notice my focus seems wrong.

Today was one of those days. I noticed I was looking at the small details and ignoring the big differences right in front of me. I don't understand that. Why am I so focused on finding something small that I don't realize a big object missing right where I'm looking?

Some people have sayings like, "Can't see the forest for the trees." The Bible talks about seeing the speck in your brother's eye and ignoring the log in your own eye. Focusing on the small details doesn't get you the full picture.  As a teacher grading a writing assignment I could concentrate on every grammar mistake and avoid getting the message or the creativity present. I could focus so much on my job that I don't acknowledge that students have other teachers and there's a big picture in education.

I had to make a list today of students who had B+ or higher grade point average. As I reviewed this elite list, I wondered what's their focus. I know several focus on getting a high score in every class. But what do they focus on? I know what I did when I was in junior high. I focused on the subjects that were the hardest for me and less on the ones that came naturally. These students in my class have the mentality that focuses on the end result. They want all As. They change their focus as their grade fluctuates.  And there's nothing wrong with that. It seems like big picture mentality and they focus on details when needed.

So why do I find myself concentrating  on so many small details? It has to be my focus. Let's face it, worrying and fretting has never really changed anything. In fact it's probably caused more harm than good. Now I'm not suggesting you quit bothering with being on time for your job or take a vacation from reality, but sometimes don't we all focus on things that are piddly?

I know teaching junior high science is important, but I also need to look at my student's future. That's scary to do. I know they will learn many new things in high school. I have to build from elementary and prepare them to transition to high school. But sometimes I think about the fact most will never get the chance to study earth science again. Yes, I'm looking at the details, but at the same time I'm looking at the big picture. I managed to focus on both.

This is a rough time of year for teachers, especially in the junior high. Hormones are running rampant and I don't want to scare any non-teachers, but the hallways are a scene from a Stephen King novel. This is a time for the big picture. It's so easy to focus on the insanity in front of us that we don't realize that half of these students will be gone in 35 days. They won't be causing mischief in the halls or talking back. They will be someone else's detail.  We may not even remember their name this time next year. Ha! Who am I kidding? I remember details too well to forget that easily. But a few years down the road, I might not remember names.

When it comes right down to the nitty gritty, I have to say details are good. But don't lose focus of the big picture. I've seen it too many times in daily life and in the games I play. The big picture will always bring your focus back on track. To all my teacher friends, God bless you as you navigate through this time of year. And remember the big picture, the end it near.

From me to you: Tips for new teachers

I've been reading plenty of tips for new teachers. They just seem to pop up on my computer. None seem to cover the nitty gritty life of a teacher in my opinion. So I thought I'd write some myself. Six of them just to clarify.

1. Listen and visit with your students. This may be a couple seconds in the hallway before school or listening to them talk during group work. You can gain incredible insight into where the students are in extracurricular activities, their comprehension of your subject or home life. Having this information can help you be a better teacher. If possible, incorporate their activities into your lessons.

2. Take your curriculum seriously, but not yourself. It's your job to teach the curriculum; no doubt about that. Quickest way to find yourself job hunting is to give free days over and over. But you don't have to be Mr. or Ms. Perfect. So you misspelled a word on a test, you tripped over your shoes, you mispronounced a word; big deal. It can become a big deal if you don't just laugh it off. Kids need adult role models. If you model someone easy going enough to realize you're not perfect, they can do the same. Let's face it, no one is perfect. And if you try to be, students will try to find fault in you. In my years as a teacher, I've had the experience of having the lock on the bathroom door break trapping me inside, fallen off a skateboard in front of the class, and numerous other incidents that escape my memory. Laughing and shrugging my shoulders is all I can do.

3.  Be flexible. And I mean it. I know you put plenty of time in planning great lessons. You expect them all to go just like you envisioned in your mind. Sometimes it just doesn't happen. It may be an unexpected phone call, or the kids didn't understand the directions or maybe just a fire drill. Don't worry about it. There have been times I expected to do something only to realize the students weren't ready or the supplies weren't there. Being flexible means you can easily move into a back up plan when things don't work out. Do I like to make great plans only to see them crumble? No! But it's much easier to toss the plans aside and take control over what you can, than fret about it. This is a hard, but necessary lesson.

4.  Be prepared. This tip embodies all the components of teaching. Make sure you have the materials before you decide to make a neat project. As you are writing your lessons, keep materials in mind. If you are relying on the internet, have a backup plan, in case it's down. I've had more than one lesson malfunction due to lack of internet service. If you are showing a video, check to see if it can be downloaded. You will be able to use it again next year if you like it. And while I'm on the subject, preview your videos. I know, it's time consuming, but you may find something inappropriate or possibly realize the subject matter was different than you thought. And don't forget to prepare your students for all kinds of evacuations and lock downs. It might mean life or death someday.

5.  Use your resources. There are a lot of resources available to teachers, but none more valuable that your co-workers. So start to reach out to your fellow teachers. You can ask about students and how to deal with them. You should seek out those veteran teachers. Fortunately for me, those veteran teachers were generous with their knowledge. I learned it's not just me working and struggling. It's all of us and we are in this together. My teaching is reflected in all the teachers who have passed along a nugget of wisdom in my direction. It may have been something simple about what they do with a kid or tips to deal with parents. But I'm forever grateful to those teachers who are willing to share their vast experiences with me.

6. Tomorrow is another day. And it's great if it's a Saturday. Just joking, folks. But seriously, my  first two years teaching were brutal. I changed schools after my first year. And the first year at a new school is trying, to say the least. I've heard some students actually brag that they ran off a new teacher in the building. Hey, I teach junior high, what else can they brag about? Ha, joking again, or am I? During that first year in a new school I'd come home exhausted and complaining about everything. Why me? I'll even admit that I sought out employment elsewhere. Thankfully, it wasn't the plan for me. I had both my sons in my 8th grade science classroom and I'm glad. They graduated from my district and I'm grateful. I found my place. Don't judge a district on  your first or second year. Get settled, get established. Realize teachers and administrators will come and go. But students need stability. I feel like I've provided that as I see some of the same parents over and over at conferences. It's a comfort. At the same time, I never know what tomorrow will bring and that's exciting.

Let me know what you think of my tips by posting a comment. I'd love to hear more tips from you.

Who You Gotta Call?

No, I'm not a Ghostbuster, although I think it would be an adventurous job. I'm a teacher. And who do teachers call? Sometimes other teachers, many times they call on students. But sometimes we have to call parents. I can't remember a teacher calling my parents or even me as a parent. As a teacher, though, I have to call parents.

Honestly, I'd just rather write an email, check it twice and send it off. Many times this works, but lately I don't get responses from my emails and then I must call. I'd love to call parents just to tell them their child did something amazing. And occasionally, I do. But it has to be big. Not just pretty intelligent. That can wait for parent/teacher conferences.

When it comes right down to it, I don't like to call parents. You are probably thinking, What's your problem? You teach and parents want to know what's going on at school. And you are right to think that. I do know teenagers don't always tell their parents what's going on at school. I hear it from parents all the time. They never bring home any work. They say they got their work done at school. I get it!

Here's my side. One, I take grades on homework, quizzes and tests. I report it on our online grading system. This system is accessible to students and parents. It's a username and password away, if you have internet. Students have internet at school and they know when they didn't turn in an assignment because I distribute the graded papers back.

Two, most parents that I have to call I don't know. I may have met them once at open house, but I meet so many parents, that I can't recall all of them. Hey, it takes me a few weeks to get the students' names down. In this strange situation, I end up feeling like a phone solicitor without a magic product. That's an awkward situation to be in. You wouldn't like it either.

And since I don't know these parents, I have no idea about their schedule. This is the most grueling part for me. Am I calling during supper? Are the parents even home or am I going to get the student on the phone? Did I wake them because they have a different work schedule? All these thoughts flash through my head as I go home and call a parent. ( I like to call from home because I know I won't get interrupted and I never know how long a call will last.)

So as I work up my nerve. Yes, I really have to do this. Maybe I'll tell myself, "No fun, until you finish your work. Even if you don't get through, you've tried." Most of the times, I call and the parent answers and something good happens. We have communication, a plan of action.

A few times I've been in the awkward situation where a parent starts yelling at the kid while I'm on the phone. This really bothers me. Do they need to know about the situation? Yes! Do I need to know how they are going to handle it? No!

Today was one of those days that I went through the working up my nerve. Told myself the emails weren't enough. I called and it went fine. We talked and made plans. We looked at the future. All I have to say is, "Whew!" I'm glad that's over until the next time I've got to call.

That's My Job

I just read a Huff Post Education blog called "12 Things Teachers Think But Can't Always say to Parents". I'll admit it's a little on the touchy-feely side. You can see for yourself here.http://www.huffingtonpost.com/matthew-dicks/12-things-teachers-think-_b_6876080.html


The comments following the blog are more interesting in my humble opinion. Many are cynical and a few are sugar sweet. I'll be honest, I didn't start teaching at the junior high level to be a sweetheart. I put my time in as a substitute in lower elementary and it's crazy hard. I came home exhausted, but still needing to deal with my own young sons.

The first item mentioned talks about loving your child a little lower than my own child. The cynic says no way. I say there are a few exceptions and they aren't who you think they are. Some kid may act in a way that reminds me of my son. Some girls remind me of myself when I was their age. It's called relating. It's necessary for a teacher.

The second item talks about missing every child. There are many former students that I miss. But in all honesty, it's short lived. That's why I go to work each day. It's called work for a reason. I have more students to think about and worry about each year. I have over 100 students a year! I have found it harder now that we do a modified looping system and I may have students for seventh and eighth grade. I find myself wondering what they will do when they graduate. And I do listen when they say they want to be a veterinarian, doctor, etc.

Another comment deals with coming to me first if there is a problem. Life would be so much easier if parents would do this. If I did something stupid, say something to me. I so dread the visit to the principal's office to hear it. Most of the time I didn't even realize what I did. If you would have shot me an email, I could have handled it without involving the principal, who could be dealing with something more serious.

Yes, there are times when legally I can't say something to you. I'm not supposed to mention other students by name. There are weird legal things that we have to implement every year. You talk to your child, you know and I know, but all I can do is possibly nod my head. Just realize I can't talk about other students with you.

Parents have their kids for a lifetime. I have them 48 minutes a day for 180 days. I care about their academics, extra curricular activities, their career choices and even the drama in their lives. Some I'll remember forever because they made some odd impact on me. But when it comes down to it, I'm here to make sure they can pass the state mandated test. I'll do everything I possibly can to do my job, because that's what I'm supposed to do.

Designer Genes

As I was "researching" on the computer today I ran across a few obituaries. Of the three, two I'd never met and one person I shared a quick visit. All these people were my relatives. And I sit here dumbstruck. The lady I met who is now gone actually married into my family. The other two men share some DNA with me. And I never met them.

As I sit and ponder this I realize I must be different. I dig long and hard into genealogy. I find it fascinating. When I see old photos I gain insight into how these people acted, felt, lived. I don't have a big family. I've got one aunt, one uncle and two cousins. I have a brother and a sister and two sons, but sometimes it seems small. My grandma was an only child.

This photo is my Grandma as a child with her mother. As I look at it, I wonder where they are. I can assume somewhere in my Grandma's hometown. Why did they stop? Who took the photo?

I feel that because I have a small family, any loss is hard. I suppose what I'm trying to say is appreciate the people you love now. Let them know you love them.  Sometimes they may be hard to deal with, annoying or maybe down right crazy. Not that I have any crazy relatives. Just keep in mind that they won't be around forever. Life is precious and no one knows when a loved one will leave this earthly body. And while I still have you thinking. You are thinking, right? Get some genealogy information from them. There will come a day when you will wonder about the people who contributed their genes to you.

 Below is my brother and me.
In case you didn't know, you share more genes with your siblings than any other person on earth.

#genealogy #family